The holidays are a time of joy, but let’s not pretend they don’t come with their fair share of stress. I’ve put together this guide to help you handle some of the most common challenges that can derail your mental and physical wellness during the season.

WHEN YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES ARE OVERWHELMING

Women often shoulder the bulk of the invisible labor that makes the holidays magical—cooking, cleaning, organizing, gift-buying—you name it. This season, let’s delegate some of the load.

If you have a partner, they are likely equally capable of sweeping the floors, handling the in-laws’ gifts, and preparing food. Your kids can help make cookies or clean the house. Ask your household members for help, even if they won’t do things exactly the way you would do them.

Also—you don’t need to do everything from scratch. Order the ham from a local shop or pick up pre-made sides to lighten the load. The holidays will still be magical even if you’re not the one doing everything.

WHEN YOUR OWN Expectations ARE UNREALISTIC

I love Martha Stewart, and if you haven’t watched her Netflix documentary yet, you should. Her commitment to detail is inspiring. But you don’t have to be Martha, nor do you have to deliver the level of perfection you see on Pinterest, which is often shared by people who make a living creating beautiful things for the internet.

Cut yourself some slack. Your family doesn’t need a tablescape that could grace the pages of Southern Living to experience joy. (Also, these pictures? Stock photos.) You don’t have to be perfect to create beautiful memories.

WHEN YOU’RE CUTTING BACK ON BOOZE

The holidays are practically synonymous with alcohol—work parties, family gatherings, holiday dinners—it’s everywhere. But these days, cutting back is easier (and trendier) than ever. Low- and no-alcohol cocktails have come a long way, and you’re far from alone if you’re choosing to drink less.

If you’re headed to a party, bring something festive that doesn’t involve booze. De Soi, co-founded by Katy Perry, makes my favorite alcohol-free aperitifs, and they taste as good as they look. If it’s a make-your-own-cocktail type of party, bring supplies to make mocktails for yourself and other guests. A recent favorite of mine is a cranberry-orange mocktail with equal parts Blood Orange Mood by Recess, Ocean Spray Zero Sugar Cranberry Juice, and a cinnamon stick for flair. (Links are paid)

If you’re hosting, you don’t need alcohol to create something fun. A DIY coffee or hot cocoa bar is always a hit. Set out toppings like marshmallows, whipped cream, peppermint, and a dusting of nutmeg or sprinkles, and you’ll have a festive, crowd-pleasing option for everyone.

WHEN Your Family is Dysregulated

We love our families, but when you pack 20 people into a small space, add flowing drinks and simmering old tensions, things get a little dysregulated. It’s okay to take a break.

Step away for a quick five-minute meditation. The Calm app has short sessions that can work wonders. Or grab your cool cousin and suggest a walk around the block. Odds are, she’s just as ready to escape as you are. You’ll both come back refreshed and ready to handle whatever chaos unfolds next.

A couple of my family members have also gotten into creative mindfulness activities since they attended Mostly Well’s Strength + Serenity wellness weekend this November. Scratch art books seem to be the current favorite, and you can buy them for $15 on Amazon. (Paid link)

WHEN Carbs Abound

Carbs are part of the holidays and you’re going to eat them—even the unhealthy ones. That’s okay. A little strategy can go a long way.

Before diving into the mashed potatoes or pie, fill up on fibrous veggies first. Fiber acts like a mesh in your stomach, minimizing glucose spikes and helping you feel more satiated. This doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the indulgences—it just means you’re less likely to overdo it.

WHEN You Overate

We’ve all been there. You overdid it, and now you’re feeling stuffed and guilty. It happens to everyone, even personal trainers.

You’ll feel better if you move a little after a big meal. A brisk 10-minute walk or a few squats in a quiet room can help your body process the glucose from your meal, lift your energy levels, and combat the sluggish digestion that comes from being sedentary. If you’re at a multi-story house, walking up and down the stairs works, too.

Second, don’t waste energy beating yourself up. Celebrating over food is one of the oldest human traditions, and joy matters more than perfection. What’s done is done, and tomorrow is a new day to make choices that are good for your body.

WHEN Everyone is Just… Sitting

My family's holiday get-togethers are days-long. At some point, everyone just… sits. That’s not necessarily bad—sometimes it’s nice to sip coffee and catch up—but it can start to wear on you when you’re used to moving your body most days of the week.

If you’re feeling antsy, suggest a walk after dinner. Play with the kids outside. Movement doesn’t have to be structured or formal—just something to get the blood flowing and help you feel more like yourself.

If you’re staying with family for a few days, many gyms (like Planet Fitness) offer day or week passes. You can also look into Mostly Well’s on-demand workouts, which include a few no-equipment workouts that can be done from anywhere.

WHEN TRAVEL IS STRESSFUL

Holiday travel can test anyone’s patience. Lost luggage, delayed flights, and crowds are enough to make us snap. If you’re flying, stick to carry-ons whenever possible—lost baggage has become alarmingly common.

Another way to ease the stress is to plan a buffer day. If you can, take an extra day or two off after you get home. Use that time to decompress, unpack slowly, and reset before jumping back into work and routine. Future You will thank you.

If you’re driving, plan ahead with snacks, a killer playlist (Christmas trap music anyone? No? Just me?), and a loose schedule. Build in time for extra stops—you’ll enjoy the trip more if it feels like part of the adventure instead of just a stress-filled slog.

WHEN THERE’S Pressure to Buy Gifts

Let’s talk about the pressure to spend. It’s absurd. Corporate marketing machines make billions off our belief that the holidays have to be expensive to be meaningful. But gifts don’t need to break the bank.

This year I got laid off, so I’m giving homemade gifts to save money—things like freshly baked cookies, bath salts and healthy granola—and I’m perfectly okay with that. Adults have their own money and can buy what they need. Kids care about the fun behind the gifts, not their price tags. Let go of the fear of judgement for not giving enough, because the people who truly love you aren’t measuring the quality of your relationship by how much you spend on them.

WHEN YOU’RE Coping with the Loss of a Loved One

This year will be my first Christmas without my mom, who absolutely loved this season. I plan to honor her by sharing happy memories with my family and cherishing the loved ones I still have with me.

If you’re missing someone this year, let yourself feel it. Share stories, laugh about the good times, and be present with the people you love. Life is short, and time together is precious. Don’t waste it on petty arguments or old resentments.

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